Family Web Profile

Another way to get our name out there for expectant mothers to find us is by creating a "family web profile" for Bethany Christian Services.  The web profile is a short letter about us, describing who we are and our journey to adoption.  This letter will then be published on the Bethany Christian Services website along with two still pictures and one slideshow.  If you go to their website (click here), you can see that many other families have made a similar profile.  To see profiles from other families, go to the bottom right corner of their site and look for "family profiles."  We hope to have our profile finished this week.  A link to it will be provided on our blog. 

W a i t i n g

It's only been 17 days since we've officially been done with all of our paperwork and on the waiting list, but it feels much longer.  We've hit the point of just waiting for a phone call from the adoption agency to tell us that we've been matched with a mother and her baby.  The agency told us that during the time of filling out our paperwork, everything would move along quickly.  They also told us that once the paperwork was done, and the home study was approved, it would feel like we hit a brick wall.  They were right.  Every time the phone rings, we jump with anticipation that it's our agent from Bethany. 

When you're waiting for something, you find things to do to pass the time.  Some of the things we have occupied ourselves with include: decorating the baby's room (so far we have the crib, changing table, and several decorations, but we're waiting for the glider, which was backordered); we're reading a book titled, "Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wished Their Adoptive Parents Knew," it's an emotinoally challenging read; and we pray every day for the baby God has chosen for us.

Some things you could pray about:

• That the mother would be taking good care of herself (and the baby she's carrying) and that she would make a final decision about adoption.
• That a baby would soon be available for us to adopt.
• That God would prepare our hearts and minds for the role of being, not only parents, but adoptive parents. 
• That we would be patient and know that God's timing is perfect. 

In our eyes, the timing is perfect...our application process is finished, our bills are paid, and it's summer -- the season of new life.  However, we know that God's timing is always perfect and so we will wait on Him.  Thank you for your support, encouragement, and prayers.

The Waiting Period

We are now in what they call the "waiting period."  Another way to say it is, "We are pregnant (so-to-speak), we just don't know how long the pregnancy will go on.  We could be waiting for a week or a year.  It's hard to say.  We're just waiting...

Some specific things we're waiting for include:
- The completion of our home study report.  Our caseworker is organizing all of the information she has gathered into a report for their office.  We hope this will be completed this week.
- An expectant mother to visit the agency and select us to be the parents of her child.
- A due date for a baby. 

As we are waiting, we will be praying for the expectant parents to make a committed decision and for the health and well-being of the baby.  We will also be reading some books about being adoptive parents.  The agency has started sending us some magazines and literature to prepare us for that role.  And, of course, we will continue putting together the baby's room.  We'll post pictures of the room when it's finished.  

We want to say thank you to everyone for your prayers and support.  Thank you for asking about the adoption process.  We are blessed to have you in our life.  It's exciting to be at this point because it was a year ago today that we found out that we were pregnant.  A lot has happened in a year.  God moved us in a completely different direction.  Perhaps the purpose of the miscarriage was to point us to adoption.  Who knows?  The fact is, we are getting closer!  Please continue to pray. 

Home Study is Finished!

Our case worker came to the house yesterday for the third and final visit.  She had several more questions for us, but this time about our community.  She wanted to know what we thought about living in the country, what we liked about it and didn't like.  She asked about our neighbors...which are few.  We were happy to tell her that all of our neighbors attend our church and they are really good people.  We also had to tell her how many miles to the nearest hospital in case of emergencies.  She even wanted to know where we would send our children to school (James Valley was our answer, by the way).

After she finished with her questions, she walked around the house just to check things out.  She took the water temperature (ours was perfect at 120 deg).  She asked how many smoke alarms we had.  You're supposed to have one in every bedroom and at least one on every level.  We have to pick up a few more.

She ended the session by working through our adoption plan.  This is a list of items we filled out that they use to match us with an expectant mother.  It went mostly well, but we do have some things to think about.  We also came up with a list of goals to work on over the next few weeks.  

Overall, it went really well.  We are now done with all of the preliminary work.  She will write up our report and send it to us for review.  After they approve it, we will become a waiting family.  She tells us that it will  be approved next week.

Yellow Rubber Duckies in the Baby's Room

On a side note: In celebration of being done with all this adoption paperwork stuff, we ordered a crib and a changing table for the baby's room.  In the picture are the pac-n-play, stroller, and rubber duckies.  We're going with a brown, green, and yellow theme since we won't know the gender of the baby.  Either way, we figure it's time to start decorating the baby's room!

Home Study (part 1)

Our case worker arrived a little after 10 this morning to begin our home study.  Amanda and I were both expecting to be split up, but she kept us together.  We answered several questions based on one of the applications we filled out a while ago.  The questions had to do with our experiences growing up; how we will raise our own children; and several other personal questions.  She was here for about two hours, which passed by quickly.  We have two more appointments with her. 

Our next appointment will be next Thursday at the agency in Sioux Falls.  At this meeting, we will be split up and asked more of the same questions.  Then, our case worker will return to our home on March 31st to do a walk through of the house.  This will be our final meeting.

Here's some good news: Our profile will be complete and we can be matched beginning the first week of April.  They are working with several expectant mothers, so keep praying.  It's getting closer...

How Long Does Adoption Take?

One of the questions we are most commonly asked is: How long does adoption take?  It's a really good question, so we want you to know the answer.

The agency told us that they are asked this question all the time, but there is no definite answer.  Once a couple completes their home study (we will start ours on March 17), they are ready to be matched with an expectant mother.  The time between completion of the home study and being matched with an expectant mother is called the "waiting period" because you are literally just waiting to be matched.  The waiting period can be very short.  Some families have had a waiting period of zero days because they were matched the first day their profile book was made available to a mother.  However, the waiting period can also be very long.  They have also had some families wait as long as three years to be matched. 

Another way to think of this time is kind of like a pregnancy.  After conception, you have a "waiting period" of nine months before the baby arrives.  The only difference with adoption is that we don't know how long our waiting period will be.  So, this is our prayer: Please pray that the waiting period is short, that once our profile is complete we could be matched quickly.  When we are matched, the baby will most likely arrive within two months. 

We finished our profile book, but have some edits to make in it.  We'll have it up here soon.

Home Study Scheduled

Yay!  Our home study has been scheduled for March 17.  This will be the first of two visits to our home.  Amanda and I will meet individually with the social worker to answer questions based on our profile surveys.  The first meet will last 2-3 hours and a second meeting will take place a week or more later.  Once our home study is complete, we will be considered a "waiting family."  We will be waiting to be matched with an expectant mother and the child she is carrying.  Things are moving smoothly and, as you can expect, we are EXCITED! 

In the next few days we will post our "Profile Book" to the blog.  This is the book the expectant mother previews when she comes into Bethany.  She will/will not choose us based on this book.   Watch for it.