Showing posts with label Bethany Christian Services. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bethany Christian Services. Show all posts
Monday, May 23, 2011
Family Web Profile
Another way to get our name out there for expectant mothers to find us is by creating a "family web profile" for Bethany Christian Services. The web profile is a short letter about us, describing who we are and our journey to adoption. This letter will then be published on the Bethany Christian Services website along with two still pictures and one slideshow. If you go to their website (click here), you can see that many other families have made a similar profile. To see profiles from other families, go to the bottom right corner of their site and look for "family profiles." We hope to have our profile finished this week. A link to it will be provided on our blog.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
W a i t i n g
It's only been 17 days since we've officially been done with all of our paperwork and on the waiting list, but it feels much longer. We've hit the point of just waiting for a phone call from the adoption agency to tell us that we've been matched with a mother and her baby. The agency told us that during the time of filling out our paperwork, everything would move along quickly. They also told us that once the paperwork was done, and the home study was approved, it would feel like we hit a brick wall. They were right. Every time the phone rings, we jump with anticipation that it's our agent from Bethany.
When you're waiting for something, you find things to do to pass the time. Some of the things we have occupied ourselves with include: decorating the baby's room (so far we have the crib, changing table, and several decorations, but we're waiting for the glider, which was backordered); we're reading a book titled, "Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wished Their Adoptive Parents Knew," it's an emotinoally challenging read; and we pray every day for the baby God has chosen for us.
Some things you could pray about:
When you're waiting for something, you find things to do to pass the time. Some of the things we have occupied ourselves with include: decorating the baby's room (so far we have the crib, changing table, and several decorations, but we're waiting for the glider, which was backordered); we're reading a book titled, "Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wished Their Adoptive Parents Knew," it's an emotinoally challenging read; and we pray every day for the baby God has chosen for us.
Some things you could pray about:
- That the mother would be taking good care of herself (and the baby she's carrying) and that she would make a final decision about adoption.
- That a baby would soon be available for us to adopt.
- That God would prepare our hearts and minds for the role of being, not only parents, but adoptive parents.
- That we would be patient and know that God's timing is perfect.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Mark Schultz - Story Behind the Song
Christian singer/songwriter, Mark Schultz, was adopted as a child. His song, "Everything to Me," was written to/about his birthmother. This video is the story behind the song. He provides a great perspective of why choosing adoption is so important.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Our Letter to the Expectant Parents
Our profile book has been printed and shipped to Bethany's office. To make the book a little more personal, we wrote a letter to the expectant parents. Thought you would like to read it:
Hello!
Thank you for taking time to look at our book. We also want to thank you for considering us to be the adoptive parents of your child. We hope that you have been able to learn a little about us and what our lives our like.
Since deciding in December that we wanted to adopt, we have been thinking about you, the expectant parents, and the baby you carry. We are so excited and thankful that you have made the decision to make an adoption plan for your child. We are sure that getting to this point has not been easy for you. We pray for you and your baby often.
We cannot wait to open our home to a baby. We have been waiting for this day for about 3 years because we have not been able to have biological children.
We want you to know that we will love your baby so much, and that all of our extended family is equally thrilled to welcome a new baby. We will continue to pray for you throughout the rest of your pregnancy, your labor & delivery, and for all the days that will follow.
Jeremiah and Amanda
Hello!
Thank you for taking time to look at our book. We also want to thank you for considering us to be the adoptive parents of your child. We hope that you have been able to learn a little about us and what our lives our like.
Since deciding in December that we wanted to adopt, we have been thinking about you, the expectant parents, and the baby you carry. We are so excited and thankful that you have made the decision to make an adoption plan for your child. We are sure that getting to this point has not been easy for you. We pray for you and your baby often.
We cannot wait to open our home to a baby. We have been waiting for this day for about 3 years because we have not been able to have biological children.
We want you to know that we will love your baby so much, and that all of our extended family is equally thrilled to welcome a new baby. We will continue to pray for you throughout the rest of your pregnancy, your labor & delivery, and for all the days that will follow.
Jeremiah and Amanda
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Our Profile Book
This is the final version of our "profile book." When the expectant parents come into Bethany, they will be given a hard copy of this book. If they like what they see, they will ask to meet with us.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Home Study (part 1)
Our case worker arrived a little after 10 this morning to begin our home study. Amanda and I were both expecting to be split up, but she kept us together. We answered several questions based on one of the applications we filled out a while ago. The questions had to do with our experiences growing up; how we will raise our own children; and several other personal questions. She was here for about two hours, which passed by quickly. We have two more appointments with her.
Our next appointment will be next Thursday at the agency in Sioux Falls. At this meeting, we will be split up and asked more of the same questions. Then, our case worker will return to our home on March 31st to do a walk through of the house. This will be our final meeting.
Here's some good news: Our profile will be complete and we can be matched beginning the first week of April. They are working with several expectant mothers, so keep praying. It's getting closer...
Our next appointment will be next Thursday at the agency in Sioux Falls. At this meeting, we will be split up and asked more of the same questions. Then, our case worker will return to our home on March 31st to do a walk through of the house. This will be our final meeting.
Here's some good news: Our profile will be complete and we can be matched beginning the first week of April. They are working with several expectant mothers, so keep praying. It's getting closer...
Monday, March 14, 2011
Children Of God
What a great reminder that we are all children of God. We have all been adopted into God's family. Check out www.thirdday.com/adopted for more information about adoption. Mac Powell and his wife adopted their fourth child through Bethany Christian Services.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Hope for a Grant
Last Thursday was our final adoption training class at Bethany. It was a five hour meeting with five other couples in attendance. Mostly we discussed attachment in adoption which is "a special enduring form of 'emotional' relationship with a specific person which involves soothing, comfort and pleasure." By the end of the session, Amanda and I understood how important attachment really is for an adopted child. You wouldn't think an infant would have trouble attaching to its adoptive parents until you remember that it spent the first nine months of life in its mother's womb listening to her heartbeat, breathing, and voice. They tell us that healthy attachment will take several months.
Now that this meeting is completed, we are just waiting to do our home study. It should be soon. It will happen sooner if our FBI background checks have returned to the agency. So, with the home study quickly approaching, we have started applying for adoption grants. The applications for these are just about as long as our adoption application. Our hope is that we will receive enough grant money to cover a major portion of our adoption expenses, that is, $14,500, but doesn't include the first $5500 needed up front. We feel blessed to have already collected that first $5500 through our own saving and the generous gifts of friends and family. The grand total of adoption expenses will be somewhere near $20000. To say the least, we are hoping for a grant (or two, or three).
Please be in prayer for us as we apply for grants. At this point, we are tired of filling out applications. Pray that we would persevere through this process. Also, pray that we could do our home study soon. The sooner we get that done, the sooner we can be matched with a baby.
THANK YOU!!!
Now that this meeting is completed, we are just waiting to do our home study. It should be soon. It will happen sooner if our FBI background checks have returned to the agency. So, with the home study quickly approaching, we have started applying for adoption grants. The applications for these are just about as long as our adoption application. Our hope is that we will receive enough grant money to cover a major portion of our adoption expenses, that is, $14,500, but doesn't include the first $5500 needed up front. We feel blessed to have already collected that first $5500 through our own saving and the generous gifts of friends and family. The grand total of adoption expenses will be somewhere near $20000. To say the least, we are hoping for a grant (or two, or three).
Please be in prayer for us as we apply for grants. At this point, we are tired of filling out applications. Pray that we would persevere through this process. Also, pray that we could do our home study soon. The sooner we get that done, the sooner we can be matched with a baby.
THANK YOU!!!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Some Adoption Language
We are learning that we must start saying some things differently regarding adoption. Here is a list of phrases and their replacements provided by Bethany Christian Services:
Rather than "real parents" say "birthparents," "birthmother," or "birthfather."
Rather than "natural parents" say "biological parents."
Rather than "real child" say "birthchild."
Rather than "put up for adoption" say "make an adoption plan."
Rather than "give up for adoption" say "choose adoption."
Rather than "is adopted" say "was adopted."
These minor variations make a big difference.
Rather than "real parents" say "birthparents," "birthmother," or "birthfather."
Rather than "natural parents" say "biological parents."
Rather than "real child" say "birthchild."
Rather than "put up for adoption" say "make an adoption plan."
Rather than "give up for adoption" say "choose adoption."
Rather than "is adopted" say "was adopted."
These minor variations make a big difference.
More Things To Think About
Thursday's meeting with the adoption agency was a big one for us. It was a little bit of training about adoption and a little bit more information to help us make some important decisions. It definitely gave us a few more things to think about.
A majority of this meeting focused on our adoption plan. The plan is divided into two major sections: adoption preferences and openness plan. As we work through the adoption preferences we are to decide whether we will welcome a child that has correctable medical conditions, severe medical conditions, a different race than ours, among other things. We also have to decide our preferences about the social and medical history of the expectant parents, such as, mental illnesses, drug/alcohol use, HIV infection, etc. While these decisions may seem simple (Who wouldn't adopt a child no matter what?) there's a lot more involved than just checking yes or no. As I think about a child with several medical disorders, I have to be honest that we may not be the best parents for that child. For example, we have no experience in caring for a child with something like Cerebal Palsy. There are parents who would be much more qualified for providing outstanding care for a child with that condition. Then I think, "Well, certainly no parents are prepared for that." So, this is the sort of thing we need to think and pray through.
The second part of the plan addresses our openness. This asks us to decide what sort of relationship we want with the birth parents. The options are open, semi-open, and closed. The "closed" option means that we will have no contact with the birth parents and the child will not know the parents while he/she is growing up. The "semi-open" option means that we will have access to the birth parents and can send them notes and pictures, though the child will not have contact with them. The "open" option means that we (including the child) will be able to meet the birth parents. This is another difficult decision and we have received advice going in both directions. It's hard to know what the right/best thing is to do. We watched a video about "openness" and it involved birth mothers. One mother said the hardest part after giving birth was leaving the hospital in a wheelchair, but not having a baby in her arms. I can't imagine how difficult that must be.
Our prayer needs:
- Pray for us as we work through the adoption plan and decide on preferences about the child.
- Pray for us as we think about and make decisions regarding our openness.
- Continue to pray for our finances. Currently we have 27% of the total we need at placement.
- Pray for that mother out there who is carrying the baby that will grow in our home.
We continue to be excited about this journey and definitely see God at work, but it can be quite emotionally draining. It will be oh so worth it in the end.
A majority of this meeting focused on our adoption plan. The plan is divided into two major sections: adoption preferences and openness plan. As we work through the adoption preferences we are to decide whether we will welcome a child that has correctable medical conditions, severe medical conditions, a different race than ours, among other things. We also have to decide our preferences about the social and medical history of the expectant parents, such as, mental illnesses, drug/alcohol use, HIV infection, etc. While these decisions may seem simple (Who wouldn't adopt a child no matter what?) there's a lot more involved than just checking yes or no. As I think about a child with several medical disorders, I have to be honest that we may not be the best parents for that child. For example, we have no experience in caring for a child with something like Cerebal Palsy. There are parents who would be much more qualified for providing outstanding care for a child with that condition. Then I think, "Well, certainly no parents are prepared for that." So, this is the sort of thing we need to think and pray through.
The second part of the plan addresses our openness. This asks us to decide what sort of relationship we want with the birth parents. The options are open, semi-open, and closed. The "closed" option means that we will have no contact with the birth parents and the child will not know the parents while he/she is growing up. The "semi-open" option means that we will have access to the birth parents and can send them notes and pictures, though the child will not have contact with them. The "open" option means that we (including the child) will be able to meet the birth parents. This is another difficult decision and we have received advice going in both directions. It's hard to know what the right/best thing is to do. We watched a video about "openness" and it involved birth mothers. One mother said the hardest part after giving birth was leaving the hospital in a wheelchair, but not having a baby in her arms. I can't imagine how difficult that must be.
Our prayer needs:
- Pray for us as we work through the adoption plan and decide on preferences about the child.
- Pray for us as we think about and make decisions regarding our openness.
- Continue to pray for our finances. Currently we have 27% of the total we need at placement.
- Pray for that mother out there who is carrying the baby that will grow in our home.
We continue to be excited about this journey and definitely see God at work, but it can be quite emotionally draining. It will be oh so worth it in the end.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Orientation Meeting
We travel to Sioux Falls on Thursday to meet with Bethany for our "orientation" meeting. During this meeting we will discuss our "openness" plan and make some important decisions about the child we will be receiving into our home. Please keep this meeting in your prayers on Thursday, 1:30 to 3 pm. Thanks!
Friday, January 21, 2011
Why Is Adoption So Expensive?
We had a nice visit with the staff at Bethany Christian Services on Wednesday evening, then again on Thursday afternoon. Amanda will write more about our visit with them soon, but I wanted to get a quick update to you. They are happy with how we are making progress on our application (just a few more things to turn in). They said we should get an award for getting our paperwork in so quickly. I thought to myself, "You can reward us by giving us a discount on our adoption." Which brings up a common question - Why is adoption so expensive?
For domestic adoption (which we are doing), adoption fees cover overhead charges, legal work, resources provided to us (the adoptive parents), but most importantly care and counseling for the expectant mother. When a mother indicates that she would like to place her child up for adoption, the agency she is working with provides cost-free care for her. As I see it, the free care for a mother is somewhat of an incentive for her to not go another route. Part of our adoption fees will cover the counseling she needs as she grieves departure from her child, as well as, some of her medical expenses. Hospital expenses for the child will be covered by our insurance, but expenses for the mother will be covered through our adoption fees. I'm willing to pay whatever it takes if it keeps a mother from bringing a child into an unsuitable home or even taking the route of abortion. When it comes to protecting life, no price is too high.
We continue to save money for the adoption, but the Lord was gracious to provide through some friends the $500 that went with our contract. We were surprised by that! The next hill we have to climb is $2500 for our "home study." We think that once that is completed, we can apply for grants. However, there will probably be another $2500 payment that goes along with our service plan before the grant is dispersed. Because we have been saving and through the sale of some paintings, we are nearly over the first $2500 hill. Praise the Lord! It's so fun to watch Him work and provide. Will you continue to pray for us on our journey? It's an exciting one.
Don't forget. This Sunday, Jan. 23, is Sanctity of Life Sunday. Life is priceless. Protect it.
For domestic adoption (which we are doing), adoption fees cover overhead charges, legal work, resources provided to us (the adoptive parents), but most importantly care and counseling for the expectant mother. When a mother indicates that she would like to place her child up for adoption, the agency she is working with provides cost-free care for her. As I see it, the free care for a mother is somewhat of an incentive for her to not go another route. Part of our adoption fees will cover the counseling she needs as she grieves departure from her child, as well as, some of her medical expenses. Hospital expenses for the child will be covered by our insurance, but expenses for the mother will be covered through our adoption fees. I'm willing to pay whatever it takes if it keeps a mother from bringing a child into an unsuitable home or even taking the route of abortion. When it comes to protecting life, no price is too high.
We continue to save money for the adoption, but the Lord was gracious to provide through some friends the $500 that went with our contract. We were surprised by that! The next hill we have to climb is $2500 for our "home study." We think that once that is completed, we can apply for grants. However, there will probably be another $2500 payment that goes along with our service plan before the grant is dispersed. Because we have been saving and through the sale of some paintings, we are nearly over the first $2500 hill. Praise the Lord! It's so fun to watch Him work and provide. Will you continue to pray for us on our journey? It's an exciting one.
Don't forget. This Sunday, Jan. 23, is Sanctity of Life Sunday. Life is priceless. Protect it.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Tree of Life and Hope
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| Tree of Life and Hope |
Amanda and I were thinking of some creative ways to raise funds for adoption. One of those ideas was to sell some of my paintings. (Did you know that one of my hobbies is painting?) As I thought about how to creatively express hope and life, I came up with the above painting. The tree represents life and hope in a barren landscape, much like adoption is for a child. One of these paintings is hanging in what will be the baby's room. It's a great reminder for us of what this process means.
If you would like to support our adoption and receive one of these paintings, please contact us by email (lifeandhope4betrons@gmail.com) or by phone (605-352-1774). You can also make a donation through PayPal. Just click the "donate" button to the right and it will take you to our secure account.
Any gift amount will help us a lot with our adoption expenses. Thank you, thank you!
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Formal Application Submitted
Our formal application for adoption was submitted online yesterday. This application allows the agency to check our family background, financial stability, personal references, and reason for wanting to adopt, among other things. They are usually pretty quick about getting a response back to us, so we are waiting to hear from them about this application in the next few days. In addition, we are working at submitting our contract with them (which includes a $500 fee) and permission to do a background check. Tomorrow we are hoping to make some headway with the "personality" portion of the application.
Additionally, if you would like to be part of our journey through a financial gift, we would be happy to have you:) We have made it easy for you by setting up a PayPal account, which you can see on the sidebar. Just so you know, donations through PayPal are not tax-deductible, but we are checking on that option through Bethany Christian Services. (NOTE: Click the "continue" button near the Visa and Master Card symbols on the PayPal screen to avoid setting up a PayPal account.)
From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for your prayers and support.
Additionally, if you would like to be part of our journey through a financial gift, we would be happy to have you:) We have made it easy for you by setting up a PayPal account, which you can see on the sidebar. Just so you know, donations through PayPal are not tax-deductible, but we are checking on that option through Bethany Christian Services. (NOTE: Click the "continue" button near the Visa and Master Card symbols on the PayPal screen to avoid setting up a PayPal account.)
From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for your prayers and support.
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